All Eyes on Sheryl

Just received this pic of the Country Music Hall of Fame show. Here we are playing "If It Makes You Happy" with Sheryl Crow and Miley:

(L. to R.) Sheryl, Jaco, me, Miley

Tonight Show w Billy Ray

Only two weeks after doing the Tonight Show with Miley, we were back with Billy Ray. Felt like we never left.


This time we were indoors, which was much warmer.


The night's guests:

I had a nice conversation with Kristin after the show. What a sweet gal.

Jaco IS Neil Young

This was the last Tonight Show with Jay Leno we'll ever do, as Jay is done in June. But maybe someday we'll be on the Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien... I can only hope!

Versailles

Flashback: Paris. On day 3, Jaco, Candice and I went to Versailles to explore the palace.

Seriously beautiful and seriously over the top.

The trees were manicured to within an inch of their little twiggy lives.

No Photoshop, Seriously

The palace itself was a testament to excess and royal insanity.

At odds with the beautiful gold-leafed everything was an art exhibit, unnerving in its randomness. You see, this palace-wide sculpture installation might have been cool... Somewhere else. Somewhere that wasn't the friggin' Palace at Versailles.

What was this installation, you ask? Balloon animals. Made of steel.

Inappropriate

Quite modern and cool actually, but not when standing in front of a gorgeous mural from the French Revolution.

Uber-inappropriate

And, as if things couldn't get more arbitrary, one piece was a steel sculpture of Michael Jackson and his chimp, Bubbles.

Which of These Things is Not Like the Other?

Then we frolicked through the gardens of Marie Antoinette. That party princess had a serious party house with a serious party yard.

Jaco took a pic of me with my serious face:

Don't Mess with the German-Egyptian Frenchman

One more beautiful night in Paris, and then we flew to London to finish the Eurotour with Miley (to be continued).

Who's This Andre Gill, Anyway?

Ah yes. Back to my EuroStory. From October. I'm that far behind.

When we stepped off the train in Paris, I immediately fell in love. I was sort of geared up for disappointment. After all, how many things in life can possibly live up to my high expectations?

Well, Paris was exactly what I thought it would be: a gorgeous city full of passionate artists, intimate bistros and cheese. Lots of cheese.

Upon arrival, I checked into my impossibly tiny hostel, the Hotel Andre Gill. Yeah, they called it a Hotel, but it was a hostel. In fact, it was basically what you'd get if somebody made a French cartoon about a hostel, complete with a big spirally staircase, Japanese tourists, and the management baking croissants in the kitchen. It was sort of like living in The Triplets of Belleville, only with much less awesomeness and much more body odor.

Okay, not exactly the Ritz, but Disney was not paying for this room. I was. And I am not a person of wealth.

Proudly Displaying Our Two-Star Rating

After checking in, I crammed myself and my bags into the smallest elevator in Europe.

I attempted to turn around while in the elevator, but my backpack and the tiny lift prevented any of that nonsense. This was the kind of elevator one could only "back out" of.

Oh also, my room was on the 6th floor, and the elevator only went to the 5th. Why?

One should not ask questions at the Hotel Andre Gill. If one does, that question may lead to other questions. Like perhaps:

• Why is my bed made for a little person?
• Why is there only a closet and a sink in my room, and no toilet?
• Why is the toilet on the 6th floor out-of-order, forcing me to walk down the stairs, in the dark, in the middle of the night, in my boxer shorts?
• Which leads to, why is there no light in the hallway?
• Why, when I finally do reach the 5th floor toilet, is the light broken, forcing me to try and aim properly in the dark?
• Why, when I want to (heaven forbid) actually shower, do I have to walk to the 5th floor, take the elevator to the 1st floor, and then wait in line for the only shower in the entire building?

So... One should not ask questions at the Hotel Andre Gill.

Apparently, Andre Gill was a famous caricaturist. Just take a moment to let that sink in.

But none of that mattered anyway, because I was in Paris (!), and I certainly planned on spending as little time as possible in my Hotel/hostel.

So out I went. First, to the Eiffel Tower:


Then, to gorge on EuroSweets:

I had quite an adventurous day out, riding the trains, meeting Parisians, speaking pigeon-French.
___________

The following day, I met up with Jamie, Jaco and Candice for a little museum hopping. First, the Rodan museum, for a little sculpture 101.

Staring Contest

The Thinker(s)

Consoling the Inconsolable

Okay, that last one wasn't in the Rodan museum. Because in Paris, there's just random sculpture on the streets. It's like a big art explosion. Otherwise known as "Mike Schmid's New Favorite Place."

At the end of that day, Jamie and I took a little tour of Monmarte: him because he's all cultured n' stuff, and me because I like Amelie.

Sacre Coeur Basillica was a sight to behold: partially because it is a marvel of architechture, and partially because the French insisted on partying hard in front of said marvel, creating a depressing and ironic sight:


Oh, Paris. Even your flaws are strangely artful.

The next day, we checked out Notre Dame, The Musee D'Orsay, The Latin Quarter and...just everything awesome. Lots of walking, lots of bread & dairy, and great...great escargot.

The final day, we went to Versailles. (Next entry).

Ich Bin Ein Berliner

We took the Eurorail from Amsterdam to Berlin.

We headed straight to Brandenburg Gate, and started soaking in history immediately.

Okay, so neither Candice, Jaco nor I had any clue what the historical significance of this gate was. We even read the big plaque thingy. Basically, it had something to do with fighting for independence. Anyway, it was big and pretty and important.

Moving on.

We went to a "traditional German restaurant," whatever that meant. Well, that meant wieners.

And heavy, starchy weightiness in our bellies.

Imagine the digestive tornado to follow. Germans have cast-iron intestines.

We then proceeded to ride the subway everywhere.

We met some really awesome German folks, who became our new friends. Partying ensued. At one point, we had a big sing-along. The Germans sang Kate Nash, the Americans sang Third-Eye Blind (okay, well Jaco did). But everybody knew all the lyrics to Oasis. It's universal.

Eventually we found our way to a party that everybody in town seemed to be talking about. Super "underground." (Of course, how "underground" could it be if everybody was talking about it?) It was a giant dance party held in a former power plant.

Note the 3rd Floor Rocking Out

There was much dancing and frolicking and stumbling about.

On the way home, I noticed that someone had written "Someday you will be loved" on a car window:
It was late, I was not-quite-coherent, and I had only seen German written everywhere. For these reasons, I suddenly felt very emotional, and started taking approximately 973 pictures of said window. Jaco and Candice had to convince me of my lameness and pull me away from the car.

And thus the night ended.

Back to our cheap little hostel we went.

Cheap Hostel Room for Three, Please

As we were totally slumming it, Jamie wanted nothing to do with us, and rented a beautiful apartment elsewhere in Berlin. I'm sure he was having fun, but we were roughing it.

Day two: we strolled down the Berlin wall.

The Most Berlin-y Picture I've Ever Seen

Over the next two days, I decided to brush up on my German (I took a few years of it in high school, but had since forgotten much). And there was more dancing. More partying. More taking the subway all over German creation.

Hot Girls On Bikes

Amsterdam. Beautiful, beautiful Amsterdam.

After BBC Switch, Jaco, Candice, Jamie and I flew from London to Holland for a little time off.

We stayed on this houseboat.

Which was very exciting,

and showcased a gorgeous view at night.

The streets were full of people on bicycles, flying every which way. It seemed incredibly dangerous to me; I always felt on the verge of being mowed down by some two-wheeled maniac.

One of Jamie's good friends wrote a song about the city, called "Hot Girls on Bikes," due to the scorching hotness of said girls on said bikes. They all looked like models...whizzing past us at high speeds. Jamie was totally into it, because he just likes to look, and not actually talk to girls he finds attractive. I didn't love it as much. By the time I even noticed them, they were already gone. Somehow though, it seemed a fitting metaphor for my lovelife.

Amsterdam is all about Overwindowing

We spent 3 days walking, relaxing, eating, walking, going to museums, eating, walking, and massaging our aching feet. The Van Gogh museum was quite moving.

Our final day in town was punctuated by an extremely random and violent hailstorm, which was kinda fun.

Hail on the houseboat next door.

Then we were off to Berlin.

The Today Show

I realize I'm a bit behind on the blogging. Life just barrels onward, and I can't seem to catch my breath. Having a great time though.

So, a couple weeks ago we played The Today Show (which along with The Tonight Show, completes the set for us, I suppose). The concert took place smack dab in the middle of Rockefeller Square, with approximately 12,000 people shoehorned in there, which was sort of like dropping the entire Pacific ocean into a drinking glass.

I got to play with the brand new, delicious keyboards that Roland supplied me with, in exchange for my Miley-related face. They're much easier to play than my old keyboards, with the added benefit of making Schmid Island look like a totally pro vacation destination.

Mike - stunned by the keyboard greatness.
Nate - bored behind his drumset.

This was another whirlwind trip for us. We got in late at night, and the morning of the show, we had to soundcheck at 5am. Miley only got a few hours of sleep, but of course she was still brilliant. And of course, so were we. That's what we get paid for. The complaining is a free bonus (I like to call it "added value").

In the dressing room, they had a big spread of donuts, fruit and sandwiches. So of course, I had three donuts. When the show began, I had a stomach ache (what am I, five? "Mikey can't resist the candy", eh?).

Jaco is constantly asking me to take his picture

But this time he returned the favor.
I'm apparently ready to fake pounce, or something.

Nate and I became fast friends. If you happen to have the show Tivo'd, you can see at the beginning of Miley's dressing room interview, Nate and I are sitting on the couch behind her, having some fun with his iPhone. He had installed the Magic 8-Ball application and we were asking it some questions (at the most inappropriate possible time). First, "will we be a complete trainwreck on stage?" It's answer: "Of course!" Second, Nate asked, "will I be responsible for this?" The ball replied, "Absolutely not." So Nate was off scot-free, but who was going to ruin the show?

We went back out to the stage and played our faces off. It was a pretty typical show: Kay and Nadia shook their little booties, I held down the Island, Nate banged on some stuff, Jamie and Jaco got way too much camera time, Vashon intimidated little girls, Stacy looked on with a broken arm and a tear in his eye, and Miley belted like the charismatic little rockstar she is.

Turns out the only thing that went wrong is that the host didn't know we were playing another song, and tried to throw to commercial. But really, 8-Ball -- "train wreck?" That may be pushing it.

Before the flight home, Nate bought me a book of Sudoku, as we were talking about how I didn't understand the mass cultural fascination with it. Of course, I also thought it was about math, and we all know how I run screaming in the other direction when confronted with simple addition. Nate explained that there is no math involved, and that even a total knob-monkey like myself could understand it. I was addicted within five minutes, and spent a good part of my return flight filling in puzzles. The rest of the time was spent watching Curb Your Enthusiasm on my iPod, attempting to sleep with my head rolling from side to side, and holding those Terra Blue chips up to the light to admire the special pearlescent chemical compound that I probably shouldn't be eating.

Good Morning America

So the giant machine that is the Miley Cyrus production invaded Bryant Park, and New York City did not know what hit it. Thousands and thousands of young girls and their moms (I think there may have been two or three young boys) piled in, filled up the park and then continued to spill up and down the adjacent streets.

Call time was 6:30am (after rehearsing the night before), so we all yawned our way through the van ride, but by the time we ambled on stage and heard all the kids screaming for Miley, their boundless enthusiasm psyched us all up for sound check.

Isn't that THE Kay Hanley?

Running through a couple songs before the show

Checkin' the mix, checkin' the mix... Sibilance? Sibilance?

Jacozilla takes on New York

After the GMA fashion show, the weather, and some stupidity about "staycations" (and we waited on stage during all of this), we finally got around to Miley's segment. As always, she came out like the little pro she is and knocked the interview and concert right out of the park. She's just always on, even ridiculously early in the morning.

Hot people and their hot moves

Some girl came up and did karaoke with us

It went very smoothly. And once again, I was barely on camera for five seconds. Schmid Island is an exotic destination; most cameramen are not up for the trip. They like to stick to the safe zones, namely Jacotown and Jamieland.

The whole show was done by about 9:30am, when we should still have been in our beds, sleeping like the west coast slacker musicians we are.

Then Nadia and I walked, like, 87 blocks for some bagels.

Stadium of Fire

Ah, Utah: state that I never planned to visit. First we filmed our big 3D movie in Salt Lake City, and now we were performing at the Stadium of Fire 4th of July Spectacular in Provo. What a unique place. The state slogan is "Home of Mormons and Meth Labs."

Upon arrival we were greeted by the strangest street fair I've ever seen. For sale: BBQ chicken, Miley Cyrus paintings, marshmallow cannons, Mormon prophet dolls (he recites scripture when you push him!), all manner of pyrotechnics, swords and katanas, and a variety of BB guns. Jaco was eyeing the BB shotgun with laser sight - only $5!

Provo is home to a large amount of ethnic restaurants. Stacy was sure that most of them were terrible. Wandering for nearly an hour, looking in windows for any sign of authenticity, the whole band eventually decided to eschew the Mexican, Italian, and blah blah blah places, and went for the yummy smelling Indian place. It was a surprisingly tasty meal. We all left stuffed.

Afterwards, I walked around town with Nadia, the new background singer. Candice has left us, and Nadia came in to take her place. I had a nice long talk with her about life, love, god, etc. A good night.

The next day, we arrived at the stadium... OF FIRE! --(Sidenote: every time I heard the words "Stadium of Fire," I also heard a big 80's drum fill and some squealing guitars accompanying an "Eye of the Tiger"-like vocalist. STADIUM OF FIIIIIIIRE! It's EXXXXTREEEEEEME! MONSTERRRR TRUUUUUUCKS!)-- I digress.

We came. We soundchecked. We conquered.

We also tested out some giant columns -- OF FIRE.

Jamie refreshed Miley's memory on the chord progression for "I Miss You."

Some of you have also noticed that Stacy wasn't there. Well, he actually was there, just not on stage. He broke his arm playing softball, and has to sit out for six weeks. But he's still the Musical Director, and still bosses us all around. His replacement is an awesome guy named Nate, who previously played on that Rockstar TV show.

The big (drum fill) STADIUM OF FIIIIIIRE!!!!! show equaled the weirdness of the previous day's street fair. It was hosted by right-wingnut, Glen Beck, and included a performance by Blue Man Group.

Much fanfair.

Much FIIIIIIIRE!

Some flags

And fighter jet flyovers

Close call

The best part though -- during the show, the words "Stadium of Fire" came up on a screen all fiery (of course!), and then my dream came true. Out from the speakers came a huge 80's drum fill, and nearly note for note, the beautiful symphony of cheese, exactly as I heard it in my head (minus the "MONSTERRRRRR TRUUUUUUCKS!" part). I laughed for nearly a half-hour after that.

Speaking of fire, check out the hotness (L to R: Kay, Nadia)

At one point, 1300 dancers filled the field and acted out all the sports of the summer Olympics in 7 minutes.

Why? Umm, dunno. Just seemed like a good idea at the time.

Oh yeah, and we played some music too.

Then we had pizza and went home.